So, yeah. I am incredibly amazing. Beyond amazing. Perfect, even. I'm also horribly bored and Neopets and my email don't work right now for some stupid reason. I also have DI today. That makes me sad. Since I know you guys all love me - as proven by the harassment I get every day at school - you should give me some money so I can go buy some coffee or something. It was supposed to snow today. That makes me gloooomy. Because it didn't. What would you guys think about a NEW MOON UNCUT? I'm feeling inspired - I showed Twilight Uncut to my dad's book agents recently! But my grandfather didn't get it. My new clothing line will be coming out soon, somewhat inspired by Molly, of all people. Because scene dinos say xXrAwRXx. And I still enjoy mocking successful emo bloggers. Huzzah!
Just a brief update for those of you who happen to have nothing better to do than read this....
Somehow, my 100 hit celebration was forgotten about, a side effect of 300+ hits. I think I'll put up the video of Molly giving scene dancing lessons anyway, though, and Twilight Puppet Pals are always a possibility. Don't be afraid, my brainwashed legions. You have not been cast aside. You shall still be rewarded with something even better.
That's right, sometime in the next week, I will be very proud to present the first release from View in Blue Film Productions*, TWILIGHT UNCUT. This is a film gathered from the cutting room floor of Summit Entertainment (it took me like 10 minutes Googling to figure out what studio did Twilight). These are all the scenes you didn't see in the movie, and a few that apparently were in there, though I haven't seen it yet. Filmed at about 2 in the morning, this is the one movie that will change your life forever. Not only is the film and sound quality amazing, TWILIGHT UNCUT guest-stars NOS energy drink, is full of wonderful improve dialogue, has stunning multiple sets, and lets you see Rosalie Cullen with a five o'clock shadow.
Coming soon to a blog near you, TWILIGHT UNCUT.
*Isn't [fake] marketing fun? Buy my CD - VIB Records - and novel - VIB Publishers - and key chains - VIB Random Crap.
Today I learned that we are all going to die a horrible death in 2012. This made me very sad. It also raised the question of why I must go to school until I die. Well, it must be to learn a way to save our planet!
Oh no.
Our fate rests in the hands of the morons I go to school with? Terrifying. You should all be scared too. Is there no hope? No salvation? WHAT ARE WE TO DO?
There can only be one solution. I call it...Pearls Before Swine.
That sound familiar to anyone? Yes, it's the name of the current modern great of the comic world. I'm sure we're all tired of those comics like Nancy and For Better Or For Worse. But now we have Pearls! This comic will save us from the apocalypse! There can only be one solution, and Stephan Pastis is it.
I also like to believe that I am Rat's brain twin. It's possible.
But what are we to do, you ask? I present Rat with the answer.
For a limited time only, you can buy a window - attached to a very attractive hat, to save your hands the work - for just $19.95 + S&H. These are only available from me, so act quickly. This window will keep that nasty end-of-the-world away!
So, lately we've been on a Lilo and Stitch kick in my house. That means we've rented every movie and watched it in the past three days. Now, some would say Lilo and Stitch is a movie about friendship and overcoming diversity and other people's dislike. Yeah right. This movie is clearly about being so depressed and lonely that it generates hallucinations. The plot is almost the same as any other recent Disney movie: parentless child saves the world and makes friends. The only difference in this movie is the aliens. These include the obese evil genius and the cross-dressing one-eyed thing. Lilo is a miserable, weird kid who has an ugly doll and lives with her inattentive sister. She also has no friends and plays with voodoo dolls. Soon she begins to lose her mind, and believes that her dog is an alien. The plot continues in a pretty traditional way from that point. It's the same disgusting thing children are force-fed these days.
However, it's pretty hilarious. I LOVE these movies.
Maybe I should become a critic - at least, an official one.
So, just for the fun of it, I Googled my blog. Because that's how cool I am. (Right now I'm supposed to be in class, but I get to skip for the next month.)
And guess what? The Google search "View in Blue" blog brought me up at number 3! NUMBER 3! I am so famous, I'm like...a rock star! And if you Google "View in Blue" then...I'm just number 21. Can we please get me in some page refreshing here, people? I will so be number 1 by the end of the month. (And, because Google gets mad if you're asked to page refresh, then do it for the sake of looking at the little typewriter with the funny slogans!
